Creaky Cat Bones

If the cat is on the floor, it's lying on a piece of paper on the floor.
If the cat is on the chair, it's lying on a blanket on the chair.
If the cat is on the couch, it's lying on a throw pillow on the couch.
If the cat is on the bed, it's lying on my clean shirt that I just put down for a second to grab my pants to get dressed.

Curtis has developed a theory (rooted in physic) for why this is. Apparently, a cat lying on a surface is acted upon in the downward direction not only by gravity (mg), but also my an electrostatic interaction between the molecules of the surface and cat fur. The two forces push the cat into the ground with more force than a typical object of mass m would experience. Therefore, cats are always looking for a little more padding to cushion their bones when they lie down. Curtis calls this theory "creaky cat bones."

Well the cat has decided that a box spring, mattress, mattress pad, two sheets, two vellux blankets, and a down comforter are just NOT enough padding. What it's creaky cat bones really need is (in a addition to all that) a human for padding. It has started to sleep on our backs, usually mine. This also puts its nose mere centimeters from the ear, meaning the purring is EXTRA loud.